I truly believe that whatever you surround yourself with, is exactly what will manifest in your life. I’ve been blessed with a loving set of parents and siblings, kids and in-laws, but most of all a one-of-a-kind custom made honey just for me. Patrick and I have been married almost 23 years now and the one lesson he has taught me is “to always anticipate the needs of your loved ones.” He lives up to this each and every day and I try to do the same.
I have several close friends and family members who are single and deserving of finding their own soul mate. Not to mention, both my kids (19 and 21)! This post is dedicated to them. I’m no expert, but I’m going to give my list of ideas to help bring love into your life.
Disclaimer: Not everyone is looking for love, I have many friends who are perfectly happy being single, so this list is just for those who are seeking le romance, okay?
1. Love yourself, as is, right now. When I used to be single, I would torture myself trying to be prettier or thinner or smarter and I always had this thought of “as soon as I’m thinner, I’ll find someone, etc.” WRONG. It’s always great to strive to improve yourself, but do it for the correct reasons, for you – from the inside out. To be a better person for the greater good, not for superficial reasons. Be proud of your signature attributes, make the most of them. Shine from the inside out!
2. Unclog the energy channels. Stop saying things like, “No one will ever like me, it’s useless.” or “All the good guys/girls are taken.” or “I give up.” or “I’m better off alone.” This also includes posting negative or sorrowful memes on your Facebook page or using hashtags like #foreveralone. (My daughter is going to smack me for mentioning this, lol!) Anyway, stop that! That attitude is a cop out! Have some faith in your life, your energy, your personality, your spirit, the universe and destiny. Think positive and really believe that your paths will cross when it’s meant to be.
3. Put it in writing. This seems really freaky, but I have this hardback book called LOVE: A Century of Love and Passion. I’ve had it for about ten years and have decorated pages in it. It’s become an altered book of sorts. Well, over time, I would write notes of what I wanted to bring into my life and even for the kids. Last year I looked through the book to find that every single note came true. I wrote the notes not expecting anything. I’m such a listmaker, I guess it was my way of documenting my dreams. So maybe you can find your own book of love and write your own notes of what you’d like to bring into your life! Keep in mind that nothing ever happens as you’d expect, so be ready for what really does come your way!
4. Surround yourself with all things heartful! See the frame up there? That is from the Heart of Haiti Gift collection. Not only is this frame beautiful, but 50% of the wholesale price goes to the artist who made it. It’s like the infinity circle of hearts! You can also make your own heart-themed frames or decor. Hearts don’t only have to be for Valentine’s Day. Hearts signify love and love is universal and a 24/7/365 thing to appreciate. You can never have too many hearts by your side!
5. Break out of your routine, be daring, reinvent! If you keep on the same path over and over, nothing will ever change. You have to be the one to take action and try something new. Take up a new hobbie, instead of canceling out on a party, go! Take a class at a community college, take up a part-time job, volunteer, go see a new band. Start a blog, Tumble or Instagram feed documenting a new project. Do all this to enrich your life, that will attract new energy your way.
6. If you are into online dating and haven’t had any bites, have your best friend write your profile. Maybe they see something in you that you don’t.Maybe it will help you see new, awesome things about yourself!
7. Surround your decor with items that are paired. Sets of two, as in couples, sets, etc. I had a math teacher once who did this and she claims it really worked! She was so cute, she said how she totally revamped up her bedroom with bright colors and hearts, etc. Every day she would wake up and look at the sets of frames, doves, etc all around and she eventually found her perfect match. They are still married to this day.
8. Realize that there is no Mr./Mrs. Right. It’s a fairy tale. Usually the ones who seem like Prince Charming at the beginning have the scary skeletons in the closet. I’ll take the guy who paints them, lol! Keep an open mind, be compassionate, go with your gut instinct, treat people as you want to be treated. And most important when you do meet that someone special and if you have doubts, think “Is my life better or worse with this person? What value do I bring to their life and what value do they bring to mine? Can I live without them?” Know that you are worthy of someone fabulous and someone who will love you and be easy to love…
9. Let go of the past. We’ve all been burned before, but don’t drag it into the present. Let it go! You can choose to stay in that dark, bitter place, or kick that energy out of your life to make space for someone new and wonderful and bright!
10. Visualize happiness. There was a time period when Patrick and I were kinda dating (we were more best friends than anything) when I wasn’t sure if we would ever develop into a serious couple. I loved him so much but wouldn’t dare let him know, I was terrified to have my heart broken by my best friend. Sometimes, I’d go to bed, close my eyes and see us together, having kids, having a colorful house, and living a happy life together. After we got married, he told me that he knew I was thinking of those things, he could feel it too. Isn’t that so cool? So don’t be afraid to put an image in your head of what you want to happen.
11. Don’t get hung up on Valentine’s Day. It’s just a day like any other. Indulge in a box of your favorite chocolates, send out love notes to your friends and family, and know that the real kind of love doesn’t revolve around a day or a greeting card or anything manufactured. It can come at any time when you least expect it, any day of the year. So chill, relax and know that every little thing is gonna be alright. 🙂
Don’t forget – none of this means anything unless you love yourself first, that is the only solid foundation to work with…!
OK, there is my list! What is your advice for those looking for love?
Love & light,